50 ways to kill a dragon
by chromehero
Summary: title is self explanatory, any way R&R, there will be more.
1. Chapter 1

50 ways to get rid of a dragon

Dragon lance

Logic

poison

other dragon1- wife

other dragon2- sexy dragon

other dragon3- mother

technology1- F-22A Raptor

technology2- Atomic bomb

technology3- C-4

sharp stick

Fizban

kender

raistlin

huma

dragon orb

cookie

easy button

common cold

meteor

TNT

gas

old age

shrink spell

Newton

genetic engineering

gully dwarf

bozak

Silenwulf (for those of you who are wondering go to , he would laugh them to death)

the chief

a shrink

feather

rabbit slayer

the flu

House

SWAT

SWAT Kats

marines

navy

the 123rd tank battalion

Myth busters

Davie Crocket

Napoleon

southern home cooking

pet rock

Chuck Norris

John Wayne

my mind

the power of rock

gravity

centrifugal force


	2. Chapter 2

Dragon lance

Seriously, do I really have to make a chapter on this one? Ok fine then

"Run for your lives!" the woman screamed as the massive blue dragon circled above the town, raining lightning bolts down from above. A little child started screaming when one of those bolts hit a man across the street and blew him into a bunch of tiny little pieces. "Who can save us?" someone screamed from inside the mob of people. Suddenly there was a deep laugh that seemed to come from all sides "AHAHAHAHA, there is no one to save you puny little worms!!!" the blue dragon rumbled "For I am blade, the blue thunder"

"Oh really, so if you're the thunder then I must be the lightning" said a brass dragon as his rider lifted a dragon lance heroically.

"GRRRRR, I shall tear you limb from limb!" The blue rumbled

"Lets dance" the rider said as he directed his brass towards the blue dragon. At the last second as they were charging at each other, the blue flipped over and dove down towards the city. The crowds screamed and ran away as he bore down upon them like a giant blue bomb. He pulled up and fired off several lightning bolts at the brass and his rider, which were nimbly dodged. Too late the blue realized he couldn't dodge the lance coming straight at him now, and as the cold, metal tip pierced his flesh, he let out a scream that could be heard in ice reach.


	3. Chapter 3

Logic

Seriously, do I really have to make a chapter on this one? Ok fine then

"Run for your lives!" the woman screamed as the massive blue dragon circled above the town, raining lightning bolts down from above. A little child started screaming when one of those bolts hit a man across the street and blew him into a bunch of tiny little pieces. "Who can save us?" someone screamed from inside the mob of people. Suddenly there was a deep laugh that seemed to come from all sides "AHAHAHAHA, there is no one to save you puny little worms!!!" the blue dragon rumbled "For I am blade, the blue thunder"

"Hey wait a second… dragons don't exist" some random guy said

"Yeah he's right, dragons don't exist" an elderly woman said

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm going t" *poof*


	4. Chapter 4

Poison

"Run for your lives!" the woman screamed as the massive blue dragon circled above the town, raining lightning bolts down from above. A little child started screaming when one of those bolts hit a man across the street and blew him into a bunch of tiny little pieces. "Who can save us?" someone screamed from inside the mob of people. Suddenly there was a deep laugh that seemed to come from all sides "AHAHAHAHA, there is no one to save you puny little worms!!!" the blue dragon rumbled "For I am blade, the blue thunder"

"Don't worry, he should be dead in a few seconds" a guy who looked like a hunter said

"What? How?" a woman said

"I poisoned his food supply" the guy said

"AAAAAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! AAACCCKK HUUUUCK AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH" the dragon managed to cough out before he fell to the ground, dead as a 10 day old rotting carcass

"Told you"


	5. Chapter 5

"Run for your lives!" the woman screamed as the massive blue dragon circled above the town, raining lightning bolts down from above. A little child started screaming when one of those bolts hit a man across the street and blew him into a bunch of tiny little pieces. "Who can save us?" someone screamed from inside the mob of people. Suddenly there was a deep laugh that seemed to come from all sides "AHAHAHAHA, there is no one to save you puny little worms!!!" the blue dragon rumbled "For I am blade, the blue thunder"

"BLADE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! what have I told you about terrorizing towns without telling me?"

"yes dear"

"and did you find the toilet plunger, that crap you took yesterday clogged up the pipes and now we have to get them fixed"

"yes dear"

"also when we get back……."

The townspeople just stood there looking mystified at the sight of this living nightmare being transformed into one of the funniest things they had ever seen, and when one person starts laughing it spreads like a wildfire, and soon the whole town was rofl at the dragon being put down by his mate

"and you have to go pick up the kids from the daycare"

*thoughts of blade* why cant someone just kill me right now*end thoughts*

"and don't you even think that commiting suicide will get you out of it either"

"damn, I forgot you were telepathic"

"don't ever let me hear you use that kind of language around the kids ever, because then ill kill you myself now were leaving" his mate pulled him along by the nose back to their lair

"……………………woooohhoooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" the townspeople said as a whole when suddenly a lighning bolt just randomly flew back at them and toppled another building

* * *

sorry for not posting another chapie sooner, ive just been busy and u know, anyways just to clarify sumthing blue dragons are my favorite dragon, next to shadow dragons, so no comments on how much i must hate blues for this, i just like them becuz they are soo cool, well peace to yalls souls and rest for yalls eyes, the next chapters will be longer, i can assure you that, warning slight cusssing in the next few chapters


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